Information About Domestic Violence and
Are you in an
About Domestic Violence
Statistics About Domestic Violence
The Red Flags
of a Potential Abuser
Sexual Assault Crisis
If You Are Raped
Are You in an Abusive Relationship?
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
m frightened at times by
your partner's behavior
to disagree with your partner?
apologizing for your partner's behavior (especially when he or she has treated you
verbally degraded by your partner?
discouraged from seeing your friends or family because of your partners jealousy?
to break up with your partner because of threats to hurt you or themselves?
like you must justify things you do or don't do to avoid your partners anger?
family or social situations because you are afraid of how your partner will act?
Have You Been...
shoved, thrown down, choked, grabbed, or had things thrown at you?
to perform any sexual acts against your will?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, it is
time to check your relationship. There are places you can go for help and
support. Perhaps you are now out of a violent relationship, but still dealing
with the pain. Call Project Sanctuary...we can help.
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Information About Domestic Violence
What is domestic violence?
"...any behavior that is intended to control and
subjugate another human being through the use of fear, humiliation, and verbal
or physical assaults...the persecution of one partner by another". (Susan
Forward, Ph.D.) This includes physical violence, emotional abuse and/or sexual
How common is domestic violence?
"Domestic violence is an unacknowledged epidemic in our
society." (Donna Shalala, Health and Human Services) In April 1994, she
announced that there are 4 million reported instances of domestic violence every
Why is domestic violence so common?
The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV)
says "Battering is an issue of crime, health, safety, ethics, politics, systems,
choices, economics, and socialization. It is an issue of individual,
institutional, and cultural significance."
Not only must individual thinking and behavior change
if battering is to be stopped, but social and cultural values that allow
battering and perpetuate it must change as well. Ingrained social stereotypes
support tolerance of abuse in families.
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Some Statistics About Domestic
- On average, a woman is
battered in the US by a partner every 9 seconds
- A woman is in nine times
more danger of violent attack in her home than on the streets
- Battered women report 4 million incidents of domestic violence each year to law enforcement in an effort to get protection. The National Coalition Against
Domestic Violence estimates that up to 90% of battered women never report their
- Battering is the single
largest cause of injury to women in the United States - over mugging,
automobile accidents, and rape, combined.
- Each year, at least 1500
women are killed by a current or former husband or boyfriend. According to FBI
data, 4 women a day are murdered by a male partner.
- More than 50% of all women
will experience some form of violence from their spouses during marriage. More
than 1/3 are battered repeatedly every year.
- Approximately 95-8% of the
victims of battering are women. Rape is a regular form of abuse in about 50%
of violent relationships.
- According to the American
Medical Association, family violence kills as many women every five years as
the total number of Americans who died in the Vietnam War. Homicide is the
second leading cause for women ages 15-24
- Between 15-25% of women are
battered during pregnancy
- 1/3 of
women in hospital emergency rooms are there because of domestic violence.
50% of the women killed in the United States are killed by male intimate
partners or ex-partners.
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The Red Flags of a Potential
- Your partner comes on as a real charmer and loves
- Your partner has problems with authority figures
- Your partner embarrasses you in the presence of
- Your partner is nasty on the road - feels other
drivers are competing with him or her
- Your partner wants your undivided attention at all
feel controlled because your partner must always be "in charge"
- Your partner has a dual personality - sometimes
adult, other times childish
- Your partner is very competitive and must always win
- Your partners promises and apologies are meaningless
- Your partner displays jealousy toward close friends
and family members
- Your partner can't tolerate criticism and is always
defending him or herself and trying to justify unacceptable behavior
- Your partner has extreme highs and lows - both
- Your partner is rough at times - love pats become
more and more painful. Suddenly, you realize he or she is a serious abuser,
and your are a victim.
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A woman is the victim of a rape or an attempted rape every 3
1/2 minutes in the United States. By reporting the crime you may prevent another
attack on you or on someone else. Even if you choose not to report the rape, it
is important that you talk to someone and not pretend the assault did not affect
you. The emotional impact of being sexually assaulted needs to be expressed. No
matter how long ago you were sexually assaulted or molested, you can come and
talk to a counselor about your feelings.
Myths About Rape
- Myth: Men rape because they want sex.
- Fact: The motive for rape is power, domination and
cotrol. Most rapists have sexual relations available to them with wives or
- Myth: Rape occurs late at night in dark alleys.
- Fact: Rape can occur at anytime, anywhere to anyone,
regardless of age, race, or class. Most rapes are acquaintance rapes that occur
between people who know each other. These rapes rarely get reported
- Myth: Rape is over in a few seconds.
- Fact: Sexual assaults sometimes last over a period of
days. The average period of time is over 4 hours. Victimization does not end
when the rapist leaves - it can last indefinately.
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If You Have Been Raped
to a safe place immediately
a friend or Project Sanctuary for support and information about what to do or
where to go.
you decide to prosecute, call the police or sheriff immediately.
not shower, douche, change clothes or alter the scene of the crime.
to the emergency room of a local hospital for an exam. If you make a police report, this service is free.
feel guilty or ashamed. It wasn't your fault!
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